Girl Goes Wild on Amish Boy

Odd; two weeks ago, I posted on sexual abuse in some of the Amish orders or settlements. This post highlights some of their naivety.

A young Amish runaway was finding a safe haven with my husband and me. The lad is compliant, pleasant, and eager to please. Days after leaving the Amish, he was hired full-time and peddled a donated bicycle to/from work every day – without complaint. How many teens do you know who’d ride a bicycle in the summer heat without whining for a car?

Our former house-guest is wise in many ways. Growing up Amish, he knows about farming, fertilizers, hard work, hunting, honesty, custom cabinetry, and resourcefulness.

But he’s also naïve about some cruel minds on the “outside.” As an ex-Amish farm boy, he has little experience with boy-crazed girls who throw their body at his; grabbing his hand, touching him, rubbing up against him, texting him to death, and the most aggressive offender who insisted he hug her in public. Her demands were counter-cultural to his upbringing - Amish don’t display physical or verbal affection - making him uncomfortable.

Although my husband and I advised him to ignore her and her predatory behavior, he thought it polite to return her constant texts and Facebook messages. She even sent me a message attempting to pull me into her passionate fantasy – ignored. When tired of her voracious appetite for him, he rebuffed her and walked away. She continued texting him, without his reply. 

Then she called the police and alleged he was harassing her. (I'm thinking yea, like he has idle time working 45-50 hours a week.)

A police officer showed up on our doorstep warning him to cease contact with her – isn’t that what he’d previously tried? This “Mom” would love to have a face-to-face with the over-hormonal, under-disciplined girl about her inappropriate advances and spiteful intent to inflict emotional harm. But God reminded me that as He was with the Hebrew lads, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego in the fiery furnace (Daniel 3:14-29); He was with our family the furnace of her creation. We trusted God - and our attorney's advice - to walk us out of her attempt to burn our house-guest without even the smell of smoke.

I never saw this potential problem on the horizon when helping those who flee the infinite and rigid Amish rules. I’m learning that their naiveté in some English life issues can cause them pain from those who lack any rules . . . or self-control.

You may've noticed, I mentioned no names in this hot topic to avoid adding fuel to the fire. It's a delicate role I have to "Mom" ex-Amish, teaching them about good/bad touch, and healthy, respectful relationships with the opposite sex.

So, you parents out there reading this, how do you protect your boys from girls who know no rules, boundaries, or limitations?

1 comment:

  1. Working in the middle school, I see this type of behavior a lot. However, for the girl to falsely accuse this young man.....Wow! That's pretty bold. That's not something I've seen or dealt with. I guess lots of mom talks have to take place to prepare them for the ills that are out there. When one doesn't have this background of experience, you don't think there is ill intent, hence the naivness. May God give you continual wisdom, Brenda, for dealing with these issues.